I fucked a somewhat gross escort yesterday. It was clinical and routine . . . BJ, missionary, doggy, orgasm. I saw her about two years ago and she was decently attractive then, but there’s been weight gain since then and the smoking caused noticeable lines and wrinkles on her face. The makeup only made the wrinkles look deeper. Her neck smelled like cigarettes.
I was disappointed but not ashamed afterward. The lack of intimacy in my life was causing concern. A prolonged absence of touch and body-to-body pleasure was making me feel too alone. I don’t want sex to become something that I have to wonder what it’s like. I immediately changed my sheets after she left, though. And then I drank 8 beers and watched a Kings of Leon concert on YouTube.